Use these questions, one step at a time, to guide your conversation.
Step 1: Establish a starting place.
1. How did you come to care about this issue?
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Did something happen in your life to lead you to care about this issue?
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Do you know someone who is impacted by this issue?
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How did you feel when you first recognized this issue?
2. When does this issue come up for you?
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Who do you interact with about this issue?
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How do they feel/think about it?
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How does this influence you?
Step 2: Reflect on Personal Beliefs.
3. Has your opinion or feelings about this issue changed over time?
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Has this issue become more or less important to you over time? What caused that change?
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Have your opinions about how to approach this issue changed over time? Why do you think that is?
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Do you think differently about this issue than you did before? How so?
4. What has made you doubt or question your beliefs/feelings/opinions?
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Have you had any conversations or relationships that make you question your stance?
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Have you seen any news stories that made you question your stance?
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Have you had personal experiences that made you question your stance?
5. What has solidified your beliefs/feelings/opinions on this issue?
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Have you had any conversations or relationships that reinforced your stance?
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Have you seen any news stories that reinforced your stance?
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Have you had personal experiences that reinforced your stance?
6. What questions do you have about the issue?
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What do you wish you had more information about?
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Do you see any holes in your understanding of this issue?
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If you could talk to an expert on this issue, what would you ask them?
Step 3: Work with Others.
7. What is your vision for the future when it comes to this issue?
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If you could change anything about how our country deals with this issue, what would it be?
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What would our country look like if this weren’t an issue?
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What would you like to say to people who are personally affected by this issue?
8. How would you change the conversation around this issue?
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If you could change the public debate about this issue from a yes/no question into something different, what would it be? Instead of asking “should we allow puppies or cats in our town?” I might ask, “how should our town engage with animals?”)
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What aspects of this issue do you wish could be discussed and aren’t?





Remember these rules for difficult conversations








